Shin an halatta yin jima'i a ranar farko?

jima'i a farkon kwanan wata: maza da mata

Wannan ba ra'ayi ba ne kamar takardar sayan magani, kuma ana magana da shi da farko ga mata. Ka yi tunanin mutumin da zai kare irin wannan ka'idar hali don kansa - suna iya tunanin cewa yana da matsaloli tare da iko. Amma mace dole ne ta kula da sha'awarta na ciki. Me yasa?

"Wannan halin ya dogara ne akan tatsuniya na bambance-bambance tsakanin jima'i na maza da mata," in ji Inga Green. - Yana da sauƙi a same shi a ƙarƙashin abin rufe fuska kamar: "maza kawai suna buƙatar wannan", "maza suna buƙatar jima'i, mata kuma suna buƙatar aure". Bisa ga wannan tatsuniya, mutum yana da komi kuma yana bin adadin lambobin sadarwa, kuma kwanan wata shine mafi ƙarancin makawa, bayan haka zai sami "hanzarin jiki." To, jima'i na mace - sha'awa, sha'awa, jin dadi - ba ze wanzu ba. Ana ganin bayyanar jan hankali a waje da mahallin dangantaka a matsayin tsokana da gayyatar aiki.

daga wannan matsananci zuwa wancan

Duk da haka, har zuwa wannan stereotype yana da tsayin daka, don haka tsohuwar zamani. Tabbas, a yau yanayin shine ɗayan matsananci - don nuna 'yanci na jima'i da rashin jin daɗi. "Barci don tabbatar da wani abu - wannan hanya ba shi da dangantaka da bayyanar jima'i," in ji masanin ilimin halin dan Adam. "Yana iya zama misalin wani abu dabam: zanga-zangar, sha'awar burgewa, samun iko, tasiri ko sabon gogewa." Kuma a wannan yanayin, macen ta fada cikin wani dogara - akan sha'awarta da / ko sha'awar mutum.

Ya bayyana cewa babu bambanci tsakanin saitunan "yin soyayya a ranar farko ba daidai ba ne" da "nuna yadda kuke da 'yanci"! Kowannensu yana bayyana ra'ayin jama'a wanda ke dora mu wani nau'i na atomatik kuma baya la'akari da bukatun mutum.

Nemi ma'auni

Inga Green ya ce: “Idan mace ta saurari sha’awarta, sai ta yarda da kusantar juna a lokacin da ita kanta take so, kuma hakan yana faruwa ga kowa da kowa. - Halayenmu na iya bambanta sosai dangane da wane abokin tarayya ke kusa. Tare da wani, ya isa mu ji wari ko kama sautin murya don sha'awar tsalle zuwa alamar "dama nan da nan da nan", kuma tare da wani muna buƙatar sauraron kanmu na dogon lokaci don gano sha'awa.

Amma idan an jawo mu zuwa ga wanda akasin haka, kuma ya kusance mu, idan mu biyun muna da sha’awar karba da jin dadi, to me zai hana wani ko wani abu ya hana mu gane haka?

Tabbas, yana da daraja tunawa game da aminci. Kuna iya fi son saduwa da ma'aurata sau da yawa kuma ku san sabon abokin tarayya da kyau don kada ku gudu daga ɗakin wani a cikin maƙwabta don tserewa kyamarar bidiyo ko ayyukan jima'i marasa dacewa. Idan ka yanke shawarar bin sha'awar sha'awa a maraice na farko, kada ka kasance mai kasala don yin taka tsantsan: kada ka sha barasa mai yawa, ci gaba da cajin wayarka ta hannu kuma ka gargadi aboki ko budurwa game da inda kuma tare da wanda kuka tafi.