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Yaya girman wannan ra'ayin gama gari game da tunanin maza da mata gaskiya ne? Komai ya bambanta - masana ilimin jima'i sunyi imani kuma sun karyata wani ra'ayi game da jima'i.
"Fadde yawanci tunanin maza ne"
Alain Eril, masanin ilimin psychoanalyst, masanin ilimin jima'i:
Duk abin da yake daidai akasin! Bayan haka, galibi maza ne suka yi imani cewa mace ta yi mafarkin an yi mata fyade, saboda hakan yana cire musu laifi don irin wannan tunanin nasu.
Ya isa a duba yadda, a cikin batun fyade na gaske, mace ta gabatar da takarda ga hukumomin tabbatar da doka. A nan suka fara yi mata tambayoyi: “Ya aka yi miki ado? Kun tabbata ba ku tsokani harin ba?
Kamar yadda ake iya gani daga waɗannan tambayoyin, a rashin sani mutum yakan yi tunanin cewa mace ta yi mafarkin an yi mata fyade. Fyade galibi tunanin maza ne, kuma a kai a kai ina samun tabbacin hakan a cikin aikina.
Amma ga mata, daya daga cikin abubuwan da aka saba gani shine ta uku, wanda ita da maza biyu suka shiga.
Wannan wuce gona da iri da ake zato ya samo asali ne saboda yadda yawancin mata, komai girman jin daɗinsu, suna jin cewa har yanzu ƙarfinsu bai ƙare ba. Suna tunanin kansu da maza biyu, suna tunanin ƙoƙarin isa ga inzali mai tsanani.
"Sha'awar kawo waɗannan tunanin rayuwa galibi yana haifar da sakamako mai ban tsoro"
Mireille Bonierbal, likitan hauka, likitan jima'i:
Wannan ba gaskiya bane ga mata. A wani babban binciken zamantakewa da masanin ilimin halayyar dan adam da ilimin jima'i na Faransa Robert Porto ya gudanar, tunanin fyade tsakanin mata ya kasance a matsayi na goma.
Mafi yawan abubuwan da aka fi sani da su shine tunanin da matar ta sake yin wani yanayi na jima'i na musamman tare da tsohuwar abokiyar zamanta.
Duk da haka, a cikin al'ummar yau, wanda ke daɗa ruɗar almara da gaskiya, da farko ina so in tunatar da ku cewa irin wannan tunanin yana da daraja kawai a matsayin hanyar haɓaka tunanin batsa. Sha'awar kawo su rayuwa galibi yana haifar da sakamako mara kyau.
Amma ga maza, da gaske sukan yi mafarkin soyayya a cikin uku-uku, amma… tare da sa hannun wani mutum
A cikin tunaninsu, suna ba shi macen su, wanda ke magana a lokaci guda na sha'awar mulki da luwadi.
Wasu mazan suna kawo wa matansu irin wannan tunanin har sun yarda su gane su a zahiri. Irin wannan gogewa ta lalata ma'aurata da yawa: ba shi da sauƙi ka kalli matarka tana jin daɗin kusanci da wani.