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Ƙin ciki: Uban fa?
Inkarin ciki yana faruwa ne a lokacin da mace ba ta gane cewa tana da ciki ba har sai an sami ci gaba na ciki, ko ma har zuwa haihuwa. A cikin wannan yanayin da ba kasafai ake samun juna biyu ba, muna magana ne game da gaba ɗaya musun ciki, sabanin ƙin yarda da ɗan lokaci lokacin da aka gano ciki kafin ajali. Gabaɗaya, toshe ne na tunanin mutum wanda ke hana mace yin wannan ciki a kullum.
Shi kuma uban yaya zai yi da wannan lamarin?
A cikin yanayin ƙin yarda, ko da babu wani abu a bayyane ya sa ya yiwu a lura da ciki, wasu alamu na iya sanya guntu a cikin kunne, musamman a matakin ciki ko ƙirjin. A cewar Myriam Szejer, masanin ilimin likitancin yara kuma masanin ilimin halayyar dan adam, tambaya ta taso: ” Shin akwai musun ciki a cikin maza? Yadda za a bayyana a gaskiya cewa mutum baya lura cewa abokin tarayya yana da ciki? Yaya ya bar shakka?
Mazaje da zasu iya shiga cikin musun duk da kansu
Ga Myriam Szejer, marubucin litattafai masu yawa na psychoanalytic game da ciki da haihuwa, kamar dai waɗannan mazan ma sun kasance. ja cikin motsin hankali iri ɗaya, kamar akwai rashin hankali. "Tunda macen bata yarda ta shiga cikin wannan ciki ba, namijin yana cikin irin wannan tsarin ne kuma baya yarda da kansa ya gane cewa matarsa na iya daukar ciki", duk da cewa sun yi jima'i kuma ga jikin matarsa. a canza. Domin ga Myriam Szejer, ko da zubar jini kusa da ka'idodin da aka saba zai iya faruwa, macen da ba ta cikin yanayin ƙaryatawa kuma mai ilimin halin mutum zai iya jurewa wannan ciki har yanzu zai yi wa kansa tambayoyi, musamman ma idan an yi jima'i ba tare da kariya ba. . Rashin amincewa zai iya tasowa saboda dalilai daban-daban, a cikin mata kamar na maza. Yana iya zama hanyar da ba ta sani ba don kare yaron, don guje wa matsi na iyali da ke tura zubar da ciki ko watsi da su, don hana hukuncin waɗanda ke kusa da juna biyu, ko ma a daina bayyana zina. Ta hanyar ƙin barin kanta ta shiga cikin wannan ciki, mace ba dole ba ne ta fuskanci duk waɗannan yanayi. “Sau da yawa, musun ciki yana haifar da rikice-rikicen rashin sani tsakanin sha'awar yaro da yanayin zamantakewa da tunani, tattalin arziki ko al'adu wanda wannan sha'awar ta taso. Za mu iya fahimtar cewa an kama mutumin a cikin kayan aiki iri ɗaya da matar, ”in ji Myriam Szejer. ” Tun da yake ba zai iya barin kansa ya haifi wannan yaron ba, ba ya so ya yarda cewa akwai yiwuwar hakan zai faru. »
Girgizawar gaba ɗaya musun ciki
Wani lokaci, a lokuta da ba kasafai ba, yana faruwa cewa musun duka. Ta isa dakin gaggawa don ciwon ciki, matar ta koya daga likitocin cewa za ta haihu. Shi kuma sahabi ya sani lokaci guda cewa zai zama uba.
A wannan yanayin, Nathalie Gomez, mai kula da ayyuka na Ƙungiyar Ƙwararrun Ƙwararrun Ƙwararru ta Faransa, ya bambanta manyan halayen biyu daga abokin tarayya. ” Ko dai ya ji daɗi ya karɓi yaron da hannu biyu, ko kuma ya ƙi yaron ya bar abokinsa gaba ɗaya. », Ta bayyana. A dandalin tattaunawa, mata da yawa suna nuna bacin ransu da martanin abokin nasu, wanda ya zarge su musamman da cewa “sun yi jariri a bayansu”. Amma an yi sa'a, Ba duka maza ne ke mayar da martani sosai ba. Wasu kawai suna buƙatar lokaci don saba da ra'ayin. A wayar tarho, Nathalie Gomez ta ba mu labarin wasu ma'aurata da ke fuskantar kin samun juna biyu, lokacin da ma'aikatan kiwon lafiya suka ayyana matar da ba ta haihuwa. A lokacin haihuwa, mahaifin jaririn nan gaba ya ɓace kuma ya ɓace daga wurare dabam dabam na sa'o'i da yawa, ba za a iya isa ba. Ya cinye pizzas guda hudu da abokansa suka kewaye shi, sannan ya koma dakin haihuwa, a shirye ya ke ya dauki cikakken matsayinsa na uba. "Wannan labari ne wanda zai iya haifar da rauni na tunani, tare da yanayin tashin hankali kamar a kowace irin rauni », Ya tabbatar Myriam Szejer.
Sai ya zama sai mutumin ya yanke shawarar kin wannan jariri, musamman idan yanayinsa bai ba shi damar maraba da wannan yaron ba. Uban kuma zai iya haɓaka jin laifi, yana gaya wa kansa cewa ya kamata ya lura da wani abu, da zai iya hana wannan ciki ya faru ko ya ƙare. Ga masanin ilimin psychoanalyst Myriam Szejer, akwai yiwuwar halayen da yawa kamar yadda akwai labaru daban-daban, kuma yana da matukar wuya a "annabta" yadda mutum zai yi idan abokin tarayya ya musanta ciki. Duk da haka dai, bin diddigin tunani ko tunani na iya zama mafita don taimaka wa mutumin ya shawo kan wannan matsala kuma ya kusanci haihuwar ɗansa cikin nutsuwa.